Hey Blue Man! I got an arrest!

[Vixen]

The only indication of surprise that Zipporah allowed to taint her controlled expression was a delicate purse of her lips. She had always thought, though it may have been a sin, that Isaac's rants of the stupidity of Outlanders had been propaganda. She had been mistaken.

Closing her ears to what was likely heresy spewing from the blue-woman's lips, she fired her crossbow. The Interloper had tried to harm a believer. If she had not already been condemned to die, she would have earned the honor then.

[Sly Cooper]

While Damon was busy rubbing his head, that had already been hit three or more times earlier that day, Jacob's eyes widened when John actually snapped back at a stupid Outlander. Then he got smug when Zapporah hit the blue woman. She sure showed John. "Let me see it." He pushed Damon's hand away from the bump. "Boy your skin is split."

"It was before that," Damon groaned.

"Whatever, we need to clean it out, and bandage it." Jacob rolled his eyes.

[ellie]

Ellie snorted at John's stupid retort. It was so stupid only a stupid country boy from like the land of stupid stupidity could even like think of it and junk. And the only cure for stupidity was red hot lead.

Right as Ellie was about to raise her firearm at John to blow his head away a arrow cleanly and neatly entered her left arm. The pain shot up her arm and Ellie stumbled backwards from the force. Her mouth gapped at the arrow that was was stuck in her limb as her brain tried to understand what happened. Then it clicked. The stupid country brat didn't understand that a crossbow does not equal a firearm. Lt. Jenny grabbed the arrow and pulled it clear out of her limb with a cry of anger.

"You stupid stupid head! Like your totally stupid and junk! I SAID get a gun so we can have an awesome fire fight! This is just stupid like your face! Stupid face!" She cried as tears welded up in her eyes. For a moment she paused hesitating to blow away the kids in the police station as her superiors used to always have issues with that in the past. But that was in the past. The Chief here obviously played fast and loose. After all what other chief liked to hang around tied to a corn stalk? Only the ones that were cool with filling children full of lead that was for sure.

"Doodie head!" Ellie cried as she started to fire her hand gun randomly towards Zipporah and ran towards her patrol car which contained her lovely shotgun and body armor. "Cover me Chief!"

[Sly Cooper]

"We should just let John take care of things. After all he does EVERYTHING around here." Jacob scoffed.

"Yeah-- I have to go back to Hemingford," Damon dashed to get out of the fight.

"What do you mean AGAIN?" Jacob followed him.

Damon turned around, "Right-- I forgot to tell you. I got married to Rebekah, we didn't want to consummate, so we went to Hemingfrord to steal a baby instead." He paused to wait for a response but Jacob's jaw just dropped. "So, that didn't go well. I mean I got the baby, then I gave to to my friend then went back to get Rebekah. So she ran and I got tied up and stuff. That's when the blue woman came in."

"Are you CRAZY?" Jacob scolded.

"Yes, but--"

Jacob inturupted him, "Well you do that, I'm staying here and going after the blue woman like Isaac commanded." He gave an angry look then turned back to the clearing, watching the insanity unfold.

[ellie]

"I'm like totally not a blue woman! I'm a blonde woman!" Ellie shouted over the gunfire which soon turn to clicking of an empty chamber. "Uh-oh..." She looked back as she sprinted towards the patrol car.

[Bunny]

John forgot all about Zipporah and Jacob and made a split-second decision. He sprinted after Ellie, his howls preceding him: "What, you going to run back to the kitchen to make us all a sandwich? Not happening today!" Punctuating this sentence with what can only be described as the bastard child of a dolphin's chortle and a Rebel Yell, he lunged forward in an attempt to tackle the infidel.

[Vixen]

Zipporah cursed beneath her breath. Her arrow had not shot true; instead of impaling the heathen's heart it had merely wounded her arm. Malachai had not wounded the blue-man, he had killed him. Zipporah had to do the same to the blue-woman, lest she surrender the position to any of the other children.

The thought of the honor going to John made her shiver. Something had to be done.

The girl burst forward, her boots clomping noiselessly on the dirt-floor beneath her. She raised her weaopon and took a haphazard aim, the crossbow bouncing clumsily with her as she ran. She fired, praying that He Who Walks Behind the Rows guided her projectile and dug it into the leg of the blue-woman. In preparation for success, she had already lowered the bow and was reaching into a sewed pocket in her dress for the comfort of cold, pointed steel.

She would slit the woman's throat, and success would be assured.

[ellie]

Ellie was indeed tackled by John. She fell to the ground landing directly on her wounded shoulder. She cried out in agony and writhed in pain. The second she recovered was extremely brief because Zipporah's arrow hit it's mark entering Lt. Jenny's left leg. It was a bad day to be a limb on the left side of her body.

Ellie attempted to rolled screaming on the ground underneath John. "Chief! THIS IS LIKE NOT COVERING ME! THIS IS LIKE TOTALLY THE OPPOSITE OF COVERING ME!!!!!" She wailed as tears ran down her cheeks. What was wrong with these rural gangsters? Were they so backwards they didn't understand this was not a cool shootout? No one had weapons! Well no weapons that counted. And they were like be totally meany head! "Stop being stupid meany heads, stupid meany heads! Go home and like get guns! WAAAAAAH!" She tried to grab at her belt trying to find her pepper spray.

[Vixen]

"Guns are a sin, they are the weapons of cowardly unbelievers who place their faith in the gun's cartridge instead of the Lord," Zipporah snarled, stalking towards the wounded officer. She used her free hand to move a stray piece of golden-blonde hair behind her ear. The other one, not so free, was clutching the thin knife, its handle wooded and layered with cornstalk, its point sharp and thirsting for blood.

"What's this?" Zipporah asked, mildly curious when she saw the interloper grabbing for something on her belt. Whatever it was, she reasoned with herself, it probably wasn't something holy. She bent down towards her prey, dagger at the ready, preparing to end the matter quickly and efficiently.

ooc: pepper spray will hurt, im sure.

[ellie]

Ellie sniffed loudly and grabbed her can of pepper spray. She she quickly attempted to flip over so to face Zipporah. "You're just like totally stupid, stupid face!" And chucked the can at Zipporah's face. "Like totally take that you dumb hick! Guns are totally awesome! This fight is L A M E! With like a capital la." And with that barrage of projectiles and words Ellie returned to her quest of getting to her car with her totally awesome shot-gun. But now at a much much slower speed.

OOC: Yeah...I bet it would.

[Vixen]

ooc; well. you certainly surprised me there.

ic:

The can flew towards Zipporah's face, and collided with it a milosecond after it left Ellie's hand. The force of the impact sent it bouncing off, and Zipporah reeling backwards, one quarter shock, and three quarters rage. "You dare to strike one of the Lord's Children?" she snarled, gritting her teeth. Upon seeing the woman limp to her vehicle, Zipporah decided to try a different approach. The Outlander's legs were mangled and tarnished by her arrows. Zipporah's legs, however, were in perfect working order. She leaped to her uninjured legs and pelted forward, hoping to reach the car first and block Ellie's way.

[ellie]

OOC: ^^

IC:

Ellie didn't stop her crawling to the car to answer Zipporah's question. "Yeah. Like totally." It was clear that with her mangled legs she wasn't going to make it to the car first. But that didn't stop Lt. Jenny from trying.

[Bunny]

John puffed his chest. "What are you doing, Miss Zippy the Screwy---" he finished this sentence with another one of his trademarked dolphin mating calls. "Rocket Maggot Jones there is still alive!" Geeze! He waved his arms like a rabid baboon demanding his banana fix. Why was he the only one who ever used any degree of thought? "Idiots!" He swore, before hurding towards the Blue-Woman, brandishing his rusted machete over his head. As he closed in on the frantic cop, he tried to jam her head with the butt of his handle, hoping the connection would completely knock her off balance, and allow him to neatly swipe off her head, so he could present it to Isaac, and so that then Isaac would finally acknowledge that he was the only one who knew how to kill Outlanders, and that the ginger Malachai knew nothing, and that Zipporah was an idiot, and that Jacob should be killed.

He wasn't sure how to sneak in that last one, but he was going to devote himself to trying.

[ellie]

The machete made contact and did manage to knock the good lieutenant off balance. But it was clear that she didn't use her brain so much anyway so the blow did little more than that. "dooDie hEad!" Ellie swore as she staggered back to her feet and tried to ram her nightstick into John's crotch.

[Bunny]

The nightstick, unlike Zipporah's arrow, did strike true. It jammed itself right into John's crotch. The self-righteous boy stumbled backwards, his face contorted into that of a Picasso on LSD, his mouth dropped into an aggonized gawk, his eyes bulging out of his head.

At least somethnig was bulging.

The pain, however, was worse than any horrific expression he could paint across his face. It tore throw him, swimming through his bloodstream and searing through the very core of his being. Why--why hadn't he just been shot? He Who Walks Behind the Rows didn't even have the privates of Unbelievers beaten in such a way!

He found his voice, eventually. It came out higher, and sparking with the youth the cult coveted so much - but John didn't feel holy as he croaked, "Arrrrgggggghhh.... You---you little bitch! You Unbelieving Maggot...Y-you... Ugh...Why?"