Murder, Kidnapping, and Other Boring Crap

[Bunny]

The simple answer was this: Rebekah was going to kill that woman. And her husband. And any other unfortunate being that happened to be residing in the house. Except for the baby. Except for her baby.

The aforementioned house wasn't anything special. An ordinary farm house, next to an ordinary farm. Hemingford was a farming community just like Gatlin, and Rebekah was very comfortable in shifting through the healthy crops scattered across the land.

Her eyes fixed coldly on the house before her. Contempt glittered in her eyes - even as she watched the woman, coddle her own child. The woman looked to be in thirties, though it was quite possible that she was younger. Short to Rebekah's tall, pudgy to Rebekah's thin, she wasn't intimidating at all to the cultist. Even from the distance Rebekah could see that she had a long, wide forehead, made wider by the way she pulled back her graying hair. Her face was round and unremarkable; cheerfully but not noticeably attractive.

her prey, unassumingly unlock her door and enter into the house. Baby in arms. Rebekah's baby.

Also, she had giant breasts. Huge.

"I hate her," Rebekah swore. "I hate her, I'm going to kill her, and I'm going to take her baby!" She turned to Damon, hoping for affirmation.

[Sly Cooper]

"I will help you and follow you as you wish. You are my wife after all." Damon's face eased into a smile. "We will get out baby and do the best that we can for it." He nodded and watched the farmhouse. Doing this felt right to him. Not so much because it's what He Who Walks Behind the Rows wanted, but because it's what Rebekah wanted, not that he's admit to that of course. The idea of taking care of a child scared him and excited him.

[Bunny]

Rebekah bent down, easing herself close to the ground, suddenly alarmed that she might be seen. There was absolutely no evidence that she had been noticed, but it certainly seemed like something you were supposed to do before breaking into a house to unleash holy justice. "Right," she said, gesturing for Damon to drop to the ground as well. "We'll have to do this carefully. I remember that my dad kept a gun in the house. They might have one too. The Lord will proteect us," she assured her husband, "but, like, that's a gun." She widened her eyes for emphasis. "Let's not get shot. We should do this quickly, make sure that they can't get the gun. Or, do it slowly, and make sure they don't get a gun. Basically, make sure they don't get a gun."

[Sly Cooper]

Damon bent down next to her and nodded his head. "Should we wait till it gets a little darker? It makes it harder for them to spot us." He looked at her as he talked then looked to the house, bent down as far as his six foot body would let him. "I think we should get the gun before anything else."

[The Bad Man]

Richard paused to dig through his pockets, searching desperately for his handkerchief. The oppressive sun beat down on his exposed brow, slicking his face with sweat. He considered his notes, and of his experiences during his most recent foray outside of Hemingford. He was certain of it now, the burden of proof had been met. Peering once more at his watch, Richard decided that it was time to phone the Shop. He snuck another nervous glance. It was beginning to get late. They might start to worry if he missed supper.

-----

Richard ambled his way up a country lane, stopping occasionally to dab at his face with the grimy rag that he had been forced to substitute for his handkerchief. The sun had already drifted low, casting a blood-red glow across the trackless fields. Far ahead, Richard could just recognize the faded signage that marked the property of Joseph and Trudy Tamorin, his grateful hosts.

[Bunny]

Rebekah tossed her hazel gaze heavenward. The sky was beginning to bleed red as the sun sunk beneath the horizon. It would not be long until total nightfall, when the pair would have the cover of night to complete their holy task. "Very well," she said reluctantly, shifting with impatience. The sun just wouldn't go down fast enough. "Then we sneak in, figure out where the gun is and --- " she broke off here.

And how exactly would they find the gun? It could be anywhere! She had been raised a farm girl; everyone she had known had guns in their house. And all of them were stowed in creative ways. Under floorboards, in cupboards, under beds, in drawers -- the weapon could be anywhere.

"Maybe..." her eyes lit up with the idea. "I have an idea! One of us runs up, acting all, like, scared, you know?" she asked. "And then, they'll wanna help us, and they'll grab the gun to kill our scaredy-source. Then they'll come out of the house and..." she trailed off. "I guess that's a stupid idea, because they'll get the gun in their hand." She brightened. "But then at least we'd know where it is!"

[Sly Cooper]

Damon looked at Rebeka, the red sky turned everything a crimson color. "It would be better for you to be the distraction. People always feel worse for girls than boys. And then when they are out I can sneak in when you have them trail off. Once I'm in you could convince them to let you come inside because it would be too dark to see and attacker." He thought for a moment, shook his head, "No that wont work..."

[Bunny]

Whatever foresight Damon had to notice a flaw in his plan Rebekah didn't have. As though the lanky boy hadn't even denounced his own words, the new, murderous bride began to leap forward and back in a pseudo-jig with unrestrained glee, forgetting for an instant the need to stay quiet. "That's perfect!" she cheered, not pausing in her cartoony leaps. "I'll go up, be all 'Ahh! I was attacked by Outlanders -- or whatever it is Outlanders are frightened of... Um..." She paused, and wracked her brain for the answer. "Okay. I'll be all: 'Ahh! I was attacked by Inlanders!' And they'll be all 'Oh no! Not the Holy chosen people! That's go kill 'em!' And then they'll run out of the house. I'll go with them, meanwhile you break in and do...something. And then when they don't find you outside, I'll get them to let me inside with them. Then..." Once again the fifteen-year-old girl grew silent as she scanned her brain for the next step in their supposed master plan. "Then we kill them." Genius!

[Sly Cooper]

"You have to say that there's a man with a knife coming for you, or somethin like it. If you say outlander or inlander, they'll know somethings up." Stomach churning, Damon waited impatiently. "I'll go to the back of the house and you'll go knock on the front door. Okay?" Despite the enthusiasm, something wasn't sitting right with him. "Should be easy enough, adults get stupid and unobservant."

[Bunny]

"Would that really give me away?" Rebekah asked skeptically in regards to Damon's statement about the phrases 'Outlander' and 'Inlander' giving them way. "Are outlanders truly so foolish taht they do not even know that they are? I know they're adults, so their minds are clouded with evil and sin and fornication and skimpy clothing..."

But she offered no further argument. As soon as she finished with her defense of outlanders' intellect, she scurried forward, her hard boots slamming loudly against the soil beneath her. Anyone paying minute attention to the farmland would surely notice her approach: you would hear her before you saw her, and you would see her pretty quickly: as a five-foot-nine fifteen year old girl garbed in Amish-style clothing and a wild look in her hazel eyes, she was quite the eyecatch.

Rebekah had advanced as close as three yards from the ragged porch of the home, when she instantly came upon a roadblock: an adult, and one well in his years was looming on the rotted wood. Already outside.

"Whoa, didn't expect that!" she hissed, and promptly whirled around, diving back into the crops and landing clumsily beside her husband.

"No good!" she hissed. "One of them is already on the porch!" How this effected her act-like-a-damsel-in-distress-plan she did not describe.

[Sly Cooper]

"There's no way to distract him? Did he notice you?" Damon made a most unattractive face as he thought. "Do you think Esau tipped someone off?" Perhaps that was just being paranoid. "What do we do now?' He asked himself, "What do we do now?" He repeated, tapping his fingers against his cheek. "What if--"

[Bunny]

Rebekah had ignored all of Damon's words after his accusation towards Esau. "That's possible!" she cried, then, recalling that an Outlander was perched on the front steps of the house she wanted to break into she repeated, but softer, "That's possible." Continuing in a strained whisper she went on, "We just trusted that the Lord was striking him down. It might have been a clever plot by Esau to distract us." The thought made a colony of centipedes crawl down her spine. If Esau had tricked them, then he might have alerted an army of rabid outlanders to tear them to pieces.

She looked eagerly at Esau. "Well," she began, crossing her legs and placing her hands demurely on her lap, "you're the husband. I think you should decide what we do." She was the best-wife in Gatlin, after all. Wives were coveted for obedience.

And also, she didn't have a clue what to do next.

[Sly Cooper]

Damon shook his head, honestly he hadn't any idea what to do. "We could stake out till he leaves but that could be a while. Outlanders are lazy after all." He squinted his eyes trying to see better. "We could go with on with our original plan and hope you distract him too. We could just go in anyway and hope we don't get ourselves killed, but that doesn't seem very smart." Granted, the best thing to do was just consummate the marriage and not get involved with any of it, and Damon knew this, but really who want to consummate?

[Bunny]

"Um..." Rebekah cast a curious glance back onto the porch. Lying in the dark surrounded by tomatoes was not her idea of a good time, and she was eager to bust in and grab her the baby. Her baby. Her little girl, Noah. Currently being pawed and poked at by outlanders.

Something had to be done.

"This is stupid!" she hissed to her husband. "Did we plan on becoming the Lord's children? Did we plan on getting married? Did we plan ahead that we would go to Hemingford? No!" She shook her head rapidly as she spoke the final, venomous word. "So we shouldn't plan on how we get the child, either. We're going to go in, and our goal is to get Noah!"

Once more, her hand dived into the front pocket of her dark dress, and it reappeared armed with the same carving knife she had been threatening Damon with just hours earlier.

"Whatever we must do to complete our quest we must do!" Once more she glanced up at the porch. She wasn't certain if the elderly man had noticed her, not that it would matter, in the end. Still, he was a threat. "I'll go in through the back," she said determinedly. "You choose your own path. May the Lord protect us."

She rose, and began to charge around to the back of the house.

[Sly Cooper]

Rolling his eyes, Damon followed her with his knife in hand. "I hope our Lord protects us, because we're going to need it." He pawed at her to let her know he was speaking to her, "I'm going through a window on the other side of the house. I'll meet you up somewhere in the middle." He sneaked off on his own way.